And now For Something Completely Different

It is with the greatest regret that I am to inform you that I am not feeling funny today. You will not get anything remotely silly out of me. If you try you will be terribly disappointed and I will be forced to prove to you that there is not even the remotest possibility that there could be even the slightest chance that there could be even a snicker, laugh or tickle to be given. Nor will you find a snort chuckle or ha. Tears will not roll down your cheeks nor will you find any surprises in your shorts. Nope, nothing funny here. Now move along.